Mother's Day Supper and a Truly Lovely Day

Mother's Day yesterday was pretty zenned out for us, actually. We woke up in the dark, as per usual, and met in the bathroom, where Mum greeted me with "Happy Mother's Day" to which I replied "You're MY mother you doofus I'm supposed to say it to YOU" to which she replied "Well I couldn't be a mother without you so shut up it's valid."

Which, I am sure, was the typical beginning of the day all round the country. 

She disappeared in the car to the gym, I disappeared on foot into New Hampshire (bonus: no horrifically disassembled wild turkey carcass in the middle of the road this time) and we regrouped back at the farm for a stretching party (I know, we stretch together, yes, internet world, we are actually that disgustingly cute) and Radio 4. 

Perhaps because it was Mother's day, she did NOT yell to hurry up in the shower which she normally does on Sundays, which is a shaving day and therefore takes longer. I appreciated it, whatever the reason. 

After breakfast and coffee (see below, pancake awesomeness) we mooched, I fantasized about buying a house in the Times real estate slideshow, she used her new Wool Fat hand cream I got her at the Sheepdog demonstration, and we mooched some more. We mooched pretty much the entirety of Sunday away, which I think was exactly the point. We did road trip it to the grocery store (the local and I think highly superior version of Whole Foods that has great produce and dairy, and also really delicious and really expensive imported crackers, all of which you never knew you wanted but which you immediately do when you see the packaging covered in Italian script with pictures of herbs and olives on them) for last minute Mother's Day Supper items, and took a lovely late-afternoon-sunshine drive. 

Also, dear reader, I want it on record that in a paroxysm of filial devotion I explained, purely theoretically, in the passenger seat of a Honda civic barreling down Route 2, not only which "tabby button thing" in Microsoft Word controls line spacing but also (coughyetagaincough) how to save a jpeg to the desktop and how to open it with the bobo-beyond-bobo Picture Manager so you can enlarge the image. I felt that I was more than amply discharging my daughter-duty at that point. In fact, I felt positively beatific. 

Thus fortified. I embarked on her requested supper, the delightfully easy yet delightfully impressive

MOTHER'S DAY SMORGASBORD 

 

Smoked Trout

Smoked Salmon (for the record, Wild Coho)

Pickled Herring

Dill Potatoes

Dill Carrots

Tomato Salad

Herb Marinated Black Olives

Näkkileipä (crisp bread), various kinds

Cheese (Blue, Camembert, Cheddar), Butter

As I said, the best thing about a Smorgasbord (our versions at any rate) is that it looks amazing and complicated and like so much effort went into it, but it's actually ridiculously easy to prepare. Most of the fish has already been smoked/pickled, most of the salads are cold, and the crackers and bread and cheese just need to be put out. Honestly the hardest part of a smorgasbord is the plating process, followed by the Tetris-like-difficulty of fitting everything on the table.

And also the not eating everything as you carry it out. That is the really hard part. I suck at that. 

Most smorgasbords involve meat of some kind, usually sliced ham, sausages or meatballs, and we very easily could have done veggie sausages or veggie meatballs. But somehow there's something in my head that says "eating soy meat and real fish on the same plate is just weird" and I never do it. I either eat vegetarian, or I eat fish, but I don't combine. I'm clearly overthinking this, but it seems like an insult to the awesomeness of smoked trout to follow it up with a tofu dog. You know?

ANYWAY

The family saunas as a kid by the lake involved lots of meat. My grandfather would take an enormous rope of sausage, tie twine around the middle, and pin it (with a wooden clothespin) over the open stove. Then as the sauna progressed, the sausage would cook. There were long period of silence in the sauna as everyone tried to outlast other people, and I tried to stop my nose spontaneously combusting from the inside, when all you could hear was the drip, hiss, drip, hiss, drip, hiss, of the sausage fat hitting the coals. The cooking time of the sausage was dictated by how long the sauna lasted. And you know what, that damn thing was always perfectly cooked. And always delicious. 

The basic concept of a smorgasbord is pretty open to interpretation (eel, anyone? shrimp omelette with béchamel sauce? beetroot and mayonnaise salad?) but the one thing that is ALWAYS on the table is . . . you guessed it. POTATOES. Hot potatoes, cold potatoes, fried potatoes, potatoes mixed with meat or fish . . . you understand what I'm getting at here. POTATOES. 

I always want to say it like Sean Astin did to Gollum in Two Towers .
POH-TAY-TOHS!
(Definitely one of my favourite scenes.) 

The Dill Potato is the most classic, delicious thing on earth. And the Beetle version, while austere, is still amazing. Again, the cooking time for potatoes is such that if you put them on to steam and then get on with everything else, they'll be done pretty much right on time. For this, use either Fingerling or mini Yukon Golds. Slice them in half and throw them in the steamer. That's it. 

When they are soft (please cook them long enough, I despise underdone potatoes, and you know what trouble they caused Ebeneezer Scrooge) toss them in a large bowl with olive oil, sea salt, and lots and lots of fresh dill. Some versions use butter, which you are welcome to do if you like. It certainly won't hurt the taste. I made them totally Beetle Friendly, so omitted olive oil and just used sea salt and dill. 

Spartan? Yes. 

Are there any left from the enormous package I bought? No. 

I have already spoken of my love of tomatoes, and it is TOMATO SEASON so there was no reason not to include them. Again, super simple cold salad. We got some really nice cherry tomatoes and they are just sliced in half, mixed with sea salt and olive oil. 

This is one of those Beetle Culinary Discoveries that makes other people go "I love you but you are so weird", but did you know that one of the nicest accompaniments to smoked trout is a freshly sliced tomato? I'm deadly serious you guys. It's amazing. 

We also had Dill Carrots a) because dill and carrots go together like woah and b) because we needed another veggie and c) because I'd steamed a stupid amount of carrots on Saturday night. Incidentally, I like my pickled herring with carrots. 

The finished table. The additional bread and cheese came out later.

We finished up the evening watching Doctor Who (Cybermen! Neil Gaiman! The Doctor playing chess against himself!) in twin food comas before crawling up to bed and passing out. It's kind of how every Sunday should be spent I think, Mother's Day or not. 

You have to understand that we pretty much polished off this entire table. Hence. Food Coma. 

And to close. Sigh.